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Technology, when it truly understands us.
April 11, 2008
Advice for AA Passengers
Do not fly, but if you must fly try locking yourself in a white room with thick padding on all walls and dim lighting. Bring a picture of an MD-80 and hang it on the wall infront of you. Place an uncomfortable chair in the middle of the room. Bring a portable radio and have the song "Anticipation" playing over and over again. You'll be at your destination in no time.

Get to the airport early, like two weeks early. Pitch a tent outside of the American Airlines terminal. Bring sleeping bags, a cooler and a Hibatchi. Don't forget to dawn your favorite sweatpants and team shirt. Don't be selfish with your grill, be sure to offer up some good old Airport Terminal cooking to everyone that passes by. If the police try to remove you, show them your boarding pass.

Stay Calm! Everyone knows that the jobs of the Check-in Clerks, Security Gaurds, Pilots, Flight Attendants, Overhead Announcers and other Passengers is to PISS YOU OFF. Don't let them go home with the satisfaction of a job well done! Be courteous, kind and patient. Rest assured that when you leave they will all have a meeting in the back room to discuss their failures at frustrating you and will definately have to come up with a new plan. No bonuses for those loosers!

Trust nothing you hear or see. Assume that when you arrive at the airport the Matrix now controls you. "...The trick is not to catch your flight, that is impossible. You must realize there is no flight, it is only your mind that flies." Should you happen to make your American Airlines flight, immediately abandon your name and refer to yourself as "The One".

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April 7, 2008
Hey Daddy...

So my 5yr. old daughter shows me this picture that she drew on her Magnadoodle. All I can say is that I am stunned by her ability to illustrate patterns. This is an example of a methodical and mathematical mind. She is so not like her Dad.

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April 2, 2008
Well it is official folks, according to the National Association of Heart, Lung, Blood & Cosmopolitan photographers, I am obese. I tested myself with the amazing BMI (Body Mass Index) calculator and I scored a whopping 30 points. According to the calculator this is not just overweight but obese. Now I would not exactly say I am skinny or thin or "in shape" but here are two point of interest about my size: I am just under 6ft. tall and I wear a size 34 waist (if you need a visual its not to hard to find one of the pictures of me plastered on picasa).

The BMI does not account for frame size, plain and simple. Calculating your height and weight is not enough information to make such an obscene judgement call on an individual. Furthermore, the BMI hurts us by promoting the model body that we see on the cover of Cosmopolitan. According to the BMI I would have to loose over 35 lbs. to reverse my obese status. If I lost that much weight, I would be emaciated enough to be on the cover of Cosmopolitan. Is that a healthy goal? I think not. It really ticks me off that we have a government funded organization promoting this usless crap.

BMI fun facts:

My Daughter:
Height: 3.5 ft.
Weight: 40 lbs.

My Dog:
Height: 3ft.
Weight: 80lbs.

My Car:
Height: 4.5 ft.
Weight: 1200 lbs.

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April 1, 2008
Google, Virgin and April 1st.
Google and Virgin announce Mars expedition and colony

Oh that is rich! Too bad I am so extra alert for this stuff on April 1st. Take the survey, definately worth the waisted time!

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March 30, 2008
1 down, 2 to go
Well, I guess I can write off McCain at this point. I am left wondering though, is this a true blunder or is McCain setting up justification for a war with Iran? I think instead of going to war with Iran we just need to cut off their supply of Harley Davidsons, heck it worked in North Korea.

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March 20, 2008
Ripped, Torn

I have to admit that for the first time in my life I am completely torn over a presidential race. In the past I would have cut off my right hand before voting for a Republican but I am seriously starting to admire McCain's moderate stance and his dismissal of the right-wingnuts. For me, his main downfall is his stance on Irac.

On the Democratic side we have the Clinton dynasty, I am tired of dynasties, mainly the Bush family. Let me make this clear: This is not about a woman being president, it is about Hillary. I feel this country is ready for a woman, as much as a black man. Clinton strikes me as being as hard lined as Bush when it comes to striking down her enemies, I'm tired of that persona and I think we need a change in the White House. She also strikes me a s being a polarizing figure, I also think we need a change from that. Besides there is the matter of her husband...let's not go there.

Then there is Obama. So personable, so persuasive, a voice that screams to bring together the huddled masses. So young, so energetic, so young, so "I want to like you", so well...young.

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March 12, 2008
Mr. President??
Can anyone tell me when we started referring to past presidents as "Mr. President"? I seen to recall that trend starting around the time that Bill Clinton and Bob Dole had that ill fated show on 60 minutes where they expressed scripted opposing opinions on a given topic. I remember hearing "Mr. Also Ran" Dole calling Mr. President Bill Clinton "Mr. President" and I thought: "Wow he still thinks Bill is president. I guess there is a reason he didn't get elected".

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March 7, 2008
Dear Consumer,

Hi its your old friend MSG. Remember me, I know it has been a while. Remember back when they tried to get rid of me? Oh man those were some rough times.:) The food industry suffered so much hardships. Food was decaying at a natural rate and everything tasted so...well, natrual. Yuk! what did foods and human tastebuds ever do to deserve such undo suffering. Well I just wanted to let you know that I am back and guess what, I'm not bad for you anymore. Thats right, all those headaches, palpitations and other various so-called "abnormal" body responses you had from ingesting me? All in your head, pardon the pun.

I'll bet you didn't know that I'm a natrually occuring chemical! Yes if you pardon the proccess of crystallization and then refining to powder form. Oh yes, Arsenic is natrually occuring too, but I don't think we'll be seeing him on your dinner plate anytime soon. Hehe, just a little chemical humor there. Don't forget to keep an eye out for my cusins, hydrolyzed proteins and yeast extracts. And yes they are all ehm... natural just like me.

Looking forward to your consumption,
Monosodium Glutamate

New York Times

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March 6, 2008
If you've been following the Microsoft takeover of Yahoo! - Honestly I never cared much for Yahoo! but I still think it is really sad to have to say goodbye to the company in the wake of it's impending doom. Last I heard Yahoo! delayed the election of the board members while they scramble around to find options to make the company less attractive to Microballmer. But a merger with AOL? AOL is a swear word in my house, if anyone says it they have to buy the next round at Starbucks. And MySpace? Paaalllleeees.

The 1 billion dollar question is, if they do this merger are the shareholders going to think "wow this is a good move" and force Microsoft into a full fledged proxy war? I doubt it. I believe they will have to cave and follow the money.

But anyway, while those geniuses at Yahoo! are at it maybe they could dump as many worthless companies as they can into the Yahoo! name and leave Microsoft with a really big mess.

Here are a few of my suggestions:
- Comcast.
- Tyco.
- Blockbuster.
- The city of Gresham, Oregon.
- Comcast.
- Nestle.
- The Sharper Image.
- Ziff Davis Publishing.
- Oh, and anything Paul Allen has invested in.
- Oh yeah and anything that I've invested in.
- Comcast.

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March 4, 2008
Virtual vs new??
Can anyone tell me the difference, in layman, between using virtual methods and just declaring a new instance of a method in C#??

class A
   public void F() { Console.WriteLine("A.F"); }
   public virtual void G() { Console.WriteLine("A.G"); }
class B: A
   new public void F() { Console.WriteLine("B.F"); }
   public override void G() { Console.WriteLine("B.G"); }
So here Class B inherits Class A. Class B has 2 methods, one declares a new instance of F() and the other overrides G(). What is the difference here and why would I use one over the other?

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March 2, 2008
put one finger in front of the other... Ok, folks I've joined the senseless world of blogging, so here I go........................ah forget it.

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